|Kids @ Cons
||[Jan. 27th, 2010|04:29 pm]
Way back in '91, (or was it '92?) I ran a convention and very deliberately insisted on a panel about being a parent and staying active in fandom. It had two two fan mums on it. Back at that point, I think I knew three people with kids that were still active fans. ( A little long, and a bit of swearing...Collapse )
Love this post. You know I agree.
2010-02-16 10:09 am (UTC)
My children have received such abuse (up to having one local fan calling them "filthy little vermin" for the crime of being in the same Dr Who panel as her-- because if you're five, and watch the show, you should apparently not have an interest) that I will never expose them to the type of people who attend cons ever again, and I've received such personal and continual abuse from fans over the last 2 Swancons I attended that I have resolved never to attend another Con either.
Perth fans can pat themselves on the back all they want for being open, welcoming, inclusive, blahg blah blah, but they're deluding themselves.
I just want to apologise to Danny for bringing this to his LJ - and to note that I say this in public, under my own name. No anonymous attacks, and I'm happy to respond in public or private.
Let me start, Lee, by saying that I don't know what was said to or about your kids - if what you say is true, that was wrong.
If you want to know why you've copped shit, you need to look to your own behaviour.
We've never met, never been introduced, never shaken hands, never had a chat, as far as I can recall.
I don't hate you - a number of people whose opinion I trust that tell me that in private you're a genuinely decent, funny, honest guy. I take their word for it, and I wish I'd seen that side of you, because that sounds like someone I'd like to know.
But in public you're a douche.
The last time I saw you at SwanCon you embarrassed yourself, and your fellow panelists and a guest of the con, by bagging out a former publisher, and not letting anyone else on the panel get a word in edgewise. That wasn't your only poor behaviour at that con, as I'm sure you've been told. And over the years you've put on a litany of similar performances.
Your engagement with the SwanCon community now seems to be confined to turning up at conversations like these and telling us that you're quitting fandom, seemingly in the hope that people will beg you to stay.
Does that help?
Contribute something that isn't arrogance and entitlement, and maybe people will care.
And lest you think this is another aspect of the conspiracy to deny you your rightful place in the community, think about this:
I say this as a man who has been disliked within the SwanCon community over the years, and who has heard most of what you have - and possibly worse. Ask around, there are plenty of people with plenty to say.
But that's down to my behaviour, not that of Perth fandom. I've been quite a lot of an arsehole over the years - in some cases I've made my apologies, in some cases I haven't. But I don't resile from who I am and what I've done, and I don't make excuses or invent conspiracy theories.
And I know I have plenty of friends, who have defended me in public and private - as have yours.
But the way I'm regarded is a consequence of my behaviour, not because Perth fandom is an unwelcoming place, and not because there's some kind of cabal out to get me.
You want to know why you get critiicised?
Look to your own behaviour.
Edited at 2010-02-16 06:32 pm (UTC)
Very quick reply because I'm in the middle of fifteen things - no need to apologise, I'm fine with it. That said, I really appreciate your consideration in feeling it was necessary.