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Writing [Nov. 27th, 2008|10:23 pm]
[Tags|, ]
[mood |uncomfortableuncomfortable]

I wrote 764 words Tuesday night. It's the first bit of fiction writing I've tried in quite a while.

It's all tripe.

I don't normally come away from something I've written thinking it's crap. Rough, simplistic, needs work maybe, but not rubbish. I can see the gleam of the ideas and people, I just need to polish them. This was a turd.

What makes it especially interesting and frustrating is that I had this entire first bit in my head, and knew it worked, and what went down on the page wasn't what was in my head. Even now, I have it in my head, and I don't know how what came out on the page got there. Even as I typed it, I knew I wasn't saying what I wanted to. Never had that trouble before. Oh I may not have the exact words, I may not have captured the feeling I was going for, but I was usually at least in the right general area.

On the plus side, I don't think there's any random words or sentences, which was a big problem for a while after the stroke. And my spelling has gone to hell, but it's not like my spelling was brilliant to start.

Interesting to try and start again, but the new issues are disheartening. Oh well, I can but try.

[User Picture]From: ariaflame
2008-11-27 01:39 pm (UTC)
It's always tricky getting back into things if you've taken a break for a while. I'm still not courageous enough to write fiction. Not even just for myself. Been far too long.
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[User Picture]From: callistra
2008-11-27 10:15 pm (UTC)
My writing was like that for about ten years. And a deep seated sense of shame.

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From: duntov_475hp
2008-11-28 05:32 am (UTC)
That's pretty much how I feel to the letter. Though I always kind of knew what I was writing was craptacular. I recently made another attempt, and it only made my depression worse. I always wrote on "Auto pilot". Lights out, laying down in bed, eyes closed. If I focused I couldn't perform.
Could it be you have a lot of other issues on your mind? I know you do, but could it be what's vexing you? Or perhaps, like an engine that hasn't run in a while, it will be a bit rough running at first until it loosens up once again.
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