dalekboy (dalekboy) wrote,

  • Mood:

Things New Parents Should Know # 9 - Bandsaw

Take a bandsaw and put it in your bedroom. Set it up so it will run all on it's own from late afternoon and on through the night. It should activate at random points anywhere between one and four hours apart throughout the night, for not less than two minutes at a time. Average length of a run should be around fifteen minutes. Maximum time an hour or so.

When it's running, every second or so it will be randomly fed wood, with occasional bits of stone and metal for variety of sound.

It should be built so it has a sweet face, scrunched up in heart-breaking discomfort that you can do nothing about. Cuddling it may help it finish a run sooner, but may not.

This is your baby with colic.
Tags: tnpsk

  • Climbing out of my hole, and blinking in the light

    Been a little bit quiet. Partially life, partially... well life. Mostly depression kicking my arse. But seem to be mostly back to an even-ish keel at…

  • Scammer, meet Bastard

    So, we had a scammer ring us yesterday. Apparently because our computer was booting up in 2 to 4 seconds, that was proof that our machine had a virus…

  • Photo catch-up

    Okay, so as promised a few recent pics of the kids. Like all little girls, GodZoe loves Batman and superheroes in general. And the colour blue.…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.