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Things New Parents Should Know # 7 - A Science Experiment - Danny Danger Oz [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

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Things New Parents Should Know # 7 - A Science Experiment [Sep. 1st, 2008|10:58 am]
[mood |amusedamused]

Here's a simple experiment for you to try at home -

Fill a balloon with grease, mud, gel, whatever you can get hold of that ahs that sort of consistancy. You don't want to stretch the balloon at all, just fill it a little, then tie a knot in the end.

Now take a pin and make, say, five holes in the surface of the balloon. Because you haven't stretched the surface, it shouldn't burst on you. Spread the holes out, don't bunch them together. Don't worry if a little of the goo you've placed inside leaks out, it's going to anyway.

Now, take the balloon in your hand, and squeeze it hard and fast. See how the goo squooshes out through all or most of the holes at once?

If you repeat the procedure you'll see that the amount is random. Some holes produce more on some tries that on others. Some will only leak a small amount of goo, while others will spray it far and wide.

Do I really need to explain the relevance of this any further?

[User Picture]From: angriest
2008-09-01 01:57 am (UTC)
OMG you've stabbed your baby five times in the- no, wait. I misread.

This baby poo thing's really getting to you, isn't it?
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-09-01 06:19 am (UTC)
Even though logically you know there's going to be a lot of cleaning up, changing nappies, wiping bottoms, etc., you can't be prepared for the sheer amount of daily hours it will absorb.

As I said to Sharon, we've gone from being regular human beings to full-time baby-poo detectors. We're either looking for it, sniffing for it, cleaning it up, or trying to avoid a semi-liquid stream of it that's gushing anywhere up to a 30+cm.

Then there's wee... and vomit...

He finally got me with vomit on Sat. I've now filled my bodily fluid scorecard as far as Lex is concerned.
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[User Picture]From: king_espresso
2008-09-01 02:15 am (UTC)
You guys need HAZMAT suits...
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[User Picture]From: kaths
2008-09-01 04:15 am (UTC)
The consistency sounds like poo, but the holes sounds like breastfeeding...
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-09-01 06:11 am (UTC)
I was thinking a mixture of wee, poo, vomit, one hole each, and the last two holes were nostrils for when the vomit comes gushing from them. Still haven't had snot so far.
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[User Picture]From: fuschia17
2008-09-01 10:22 am (UTC)
Did I mention that you are freaking me out?!
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-09-01 01:31 pm (UTC)
At least you will be as prepared as you can be!
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[User Picture]From: meljane
2008-09-01 01:28 pm (UTC)
Now I know why new parents don't go out much with their baby in the first few weeks in case the baby leaks or explodes *ewww* .
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-09-01 01:32 pm (UTC)
No they can explode any time. The first few weeks is due to being utterly exhausted and learning to deal with explosions and leaks.
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[User Picture]From: rabbit1080
2008-09-01 01:43 pm (UTC)

slightly on-topic

We've just been watching a video of a giant squid being dissected at Melbourne Uni. There are several big (human arm-length) snot-producing glands for various purposes. The scientists are being very very careful not to cut the ink sac as the ink goes EVERYWHERE. Lots of goo. Apparently it was also quite smelly.

You can download the video from here:
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