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Blue [Feb. 14th, 2008|11:11 am]
dalekboy
[Tags|, , ]
[mood |depresseddepressed]

Feeling very down today. Nothing to do with Valentine's Day, the timing on that is purely coincidental. Been dodging a major depression for several weeks, struggling to get things done, dad would have been 73 last Friday, etc.

The kick-over point was Tuesday night, had a very bad reaction to a really icky bit of Chicken Kiev. Have had Chicken Kiev a few times before, was getting through this one ok, but then got really bizarrely weird texture I hadn't struck before, kind of a rubbery/jelly texture, which freaked me right out. It's by far the worst reaction I've had in a few years, really upsetting. Still feeling freaked now.

So that was the major tipping point. I've been doing so well on foods, slowly but steadily getting through new ones, that having such an extreme response was quite upsetting. And of course I'm feeling very tentative about trying anything new right now. That combined with needing to spend all my time and energy this week getting things done for mum, so I've got nothing left for the things I need to get done for myself or the trip, just concreted the mood in. And so the spiral continues.

It's cool, I'll live, it's just annoying. In the sort of mood where I just want to curl up in a ball in someone's arms and weep, stay in bed, or lose the day to lots of nicely distracting sex - none of which are an option. I'm struggling to do the stuff I know I need to to help alleviate or beat the mood. And one of the annoying things is that my mood has meant I wasn't able to fully appreciate the apology yesterday. I've waited a long time for that.

So feel free to tell me something nice and jolly. It doesn't have to relate to me or my life in any way at all. I'm always happy for other people's good news, experiences, ideas, or thoughts.
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Comments:
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[User Picture]From: kaths
2008-02-14 01:35 am (UTC)
That's so cool :)
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[User Picture]From: vanilla_extreme
2008-02-14 01:57 am (UTC)
Just letting you know that I am fine. In case you forgot.
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-02-14 03:35 am (UTC)
Thank you dude. I was just thinking about that the other week. It's good to know you're fine :D
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[User Picture]From: drjon
2008-02-14 02:03 am (UTC)
I've found that this new Earth Rat Year is turning out a lot happier and wonderfuller for me than last year's Fire Pig Year.

I hope the same happens for you. Soon.
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-02-14 03:36 am (UTC)
My life's not bad, especially not when compared to the last couple of years of strife, I'm just blue which magnifies things. But thank you :)
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[User Picture]From: subtle_eye
2008-02-14 02:03 am (UTC)
Tonight I'm headed to a "subvert the dominant paradigm" v-day dinner ... partners + special friends + etc.
I think the plan is to go out and have awesome Malaysian food, and then go make a 12 person puppy pile in someones lounge room
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[User Picture]From: angriest
2008-02-14 02:09 am (UTC)
Distraction time!!

The Invasion of Time, while not an all-out classic, is a lot better than most fans give it credit for. Discuss.
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[User Picture]From: arcadiagt5
2008-02-14 02:17 am (UTC)
Can't remember seeing it so I'll take your word for it.
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[User Picture]From: arcadiagt5
2008-02-14 02:15 am (UTC)
I worked out how to use bittorrents and am getting the third season of ARIA as it appears with subtitles. Oh, and I downloaded the OAV this morning.

Which reminds me, must call Slow Glass and see if he's got any of the manga in to send to me yet. :)
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From: leecetheartist
2008-02-14 02:36 am (UTC)
It's finally cooler here in Perth! We have been sweltering.
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[User Picture]From: bunnikins
2008-02-14 02:36 am (UTC)
I'm making a Thing every day this month, along with over a thousand other people. It's over here if you want to take a look, I'm having a lot of fun so far!

And if that's not jolly enough, how about, ummm, CHEER UP OR I WILL KICK YOU!!1!!111!one!!11!!

...Did that work?
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[User Picture]From: vegetus
2008-02-14 03:08 am (UTC)
I got to pat puppies today and they were really cute.

And my comments about my magical vegan cunt are amusing many people in various lj vegan communities :)
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-02-14 03:43 am (UTC)
I like puppies. And I love their smell.

As to your cunt's magical vegan properties - prove it! *wicks*
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-02-14 04:55 am (UTC)
Stop trying to seduce me with tales of Bukkake Kangaroos!
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[User Picture]From: rabbit1080
2008-02-14 05:16 am (UTC)

off-topic??

This comment from your other post today reminded me a line from the movie "South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut."

"I just gave you sweet loving 5 minutes ago. Are you trying to kill me!?" - Chef.
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-02-14 05:21 am (UTC)

Re: off-topic??

Chef is so much better than me, I need at least ten *grin*
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[User Picture]From: damienps
2008-02-14 06:29 am (UTC)
Today was the second Valentine's Day which I've had with my wife Jax that you met last year in Melbourne.
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[User Picture]From: battblush
2008-02-14 06:58 am (UTC)
I love it when Lee and I are out in public and my sms alarm goes off. I read it and Lee asks "Well?"

"Danny just cocked me," I reply, in front of anyone who's there, usually the time-weary check-out chick. Lee always hugs me with a smile and answers "He's so caring."

My phone rarely has enough credit to reply (I have teenagers) but I do want you to known I'm always thinking of you.
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From: tommmo
2008-02-14 07:34 am (UTC)
You're definitely one of the people I "properly" met while running SwanCon last year that I'm really looking forward to seeing again. I think you're a cool guy and hope to get a few more chances to chat with you during this year's con.

I hope your blues are chased away soon :)
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[User Picture]From: strangedave
2008-02-14 08:36 am (UTC)
All our belongings, including books and CDs and DVDs and DVD player, arrived yesterday. We celebrated by watching the Fast Show and Futurama DVDs. I can't stop laughing over the fast show guy who says "they've got this virtual reality. Its like regular reality, but you're wearing a hat! Brilliant!"

You'd like it out here.
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