|My relationships, health, and related...
||[Jan. 5th, 2007|11:02 am]
I wrote yesterday about shazgirl getting upset about my deteriorating health. In retrospect, knowing Shaz as I do I'm amazed it didn't happen sooner, though given how very well she'd been dealing with it, when it did happen it was a heartbreaking surprise. She's strong, but protective and a little fragile when it comes to me being hurt, as you'd expect. She would cheerfully defenestrate anyone who threatened me with harm, but this is something where she can't help except by offering support, both emotional and physical. Especially as I become increasingly unreliable and have difficulty with things, she can only watch my frustration at not being who I know I should be, with no way to take away the pain of that.
Kali I suspect sees this more the way I do - it's a nuisance and a bit of a shame - though I may be wrong on that. I've assumed it hasn't affected her as deeply because she doesn't show it, but then, I often don't show it either. At one point while driving together I commented a few times on the pain in my legs, then later asked if what I was doing was whingeing, in my usual concerns of being an imposition or nuisance. She said no, I wasn't whingeing, it was more a giving of updates, which was important because if I don't do that, even she doesn't realise how badly I'm doing at any given time, and she knows me at least as well as Sharon.( Read more...Collapse )