|Nice to be appreciated
||[Dec. 10th, 2007|11:00 pm]
Despite my back giving me grief, it's hard to be down. I've been shown affection or appreciation from four women in less than a week!
Well, Sharon loves and appreciates me, of course. But we had a friend visit the other day, a lady I've just kind of clicked with. As it happened, she was exhausted and so were Sharon and myself, so we all ended up crashed out on the big bed. Nothing sexual happened, nor was that anyone's intention, but I have to say that while it's nice to be snoozing with a person you like and care about, it's amazingly nice to be resting close to two of them. And I got cuddles. Lovely.
Was chatting with a female friend tonight and she asked me about sexual fantasies - specifically if it's a compliment or creepy that someone fantasizes about you. I said that it can be creepy, if it's someone you really don't like, or if they volunteer info when you don't want it, but for the most part I think it's complimentary. We chatted a bit and then she admitted that she'd thought about me in that way a few times.
Given my low self-esteem, poor opinion of my looks, that I've been quite down lately, and the fact I felt like a useless pile of crap because I was in pain with my back, this was really one of the nicest things I could have heard. I feel quite privileged and honoured and very grateful to be thought of like that. It also helps that it was someone I think of as rather spunky. I don't know that anything will ever happen between us, but it doesn't change the fact that I feel very complimented... and a little shy, unworthy, and blushy :)
Seshat arrives in a little under 24 hours to hang out for a while. She's basically coming from interstate to see more of me. Very much looking forward to hanging with her, and glad all she was wanting was my company and friendship, because if she was expecting or wanting a red hot love machine, well both of us would be looking at a pretty major disappointment. I think the most I can manage is to lie around, and any groans are not likely to be from lust! But we'll enjoy chatting, and cuddling, and we have lots to talk about.
Then Shaz comes home on Thursday, which is good because I'm missing her already, and I get to hang with two women I'm in love with for a few days.
Oh! And Nikki, the photographer at the place I'm playing Father Christmas, has invited us to her housewarming, basically because she thinks I'm really cool! Given I think she's awesome, that invite really meant a lot. That's five!
So feeling a rather weepy at the moment, but only because I don't feel worthy of this much love and appreciation.