dalekboy (dalekboy) wrote,
dalekboy
dalekboy

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The 'My Sexuality' Poll

Well, here is the poll at last, and it's huge! You don't have to, of course, but I'd recommend reading (or re-reading, if you need the reminder) the following 100 Days of Love and Hate posts, Human Sexuality, My Penis, Needing Intimacy. For other posts that may influence your answers look here.

Naturally, the My Sexuality post is required reading for this quiz.

I'm trying to accurately reflect myself and the sorts of liasions I've had over the years, which means a poll simply listing sexual situations and asking if someone wanted to do me was never going to be an option.

I'm fine with intimacy at all sorts of levels with various different people. What feels right or comfortable varies from person to person, and changes over time. There are folks where I've had a more teacherly role, where the idea of things being done for me was never an option. There have been people where they wanted more but what I needed was less about sex than it was about needing to be close. I'm fine with casual nudity as well, though it takes me a while to stop automatically averting my eyes. So the concept of cuddling naked in bed, with no sex expected or needed, had to fit in there too.

So the poll tries to progress from just subjects to talk about, to levels of intimacy that are non-sexual like handshakes, building to the sexual, then on to actual sex questions. From there I'll probably also throw in a few things that can be incredibly caring/intimate/sensual, but not necessarily sexual, like showering together or massage.

A special thank you to my helpers in getting the poll together. You guys rock!

If, after the poll, you'd like to talk about any/all of this, just comment to that effect. Any other thoughts, comment as well. All comments will be screened.

As usual, I will only unscreen comments that finish with the word 'Yes'.


A Bunch of Very Important Points

- If you've only know me through livejournal and have been reading me for a week, or you've known me my whole life, you're welcome to do the poll. The longer you've known me, the more I'd really like you to do the poll.

- Guys! Yes, this poll is aimed squarely at the girls. I'm bi, but well... I'm super-picky with women and insanely picky when it comes to men. If you're male, I'd appreciate you only doing the poll if you have some level of interest in me from the physical/emotional viewpoint. If you're a guy and fancy me rotten, it's still a compliment! For the rest of you, feel free to only pick a few things, like talks, handshakes, hugs, etc., and ignore the rest. I just want to avoid having a bunch of blokes go through picking lots of negatives and buggering up the results. If I'm going to be firmly rejected, I'd like it to be from my preferred gender :)

- Anything you say in this poll will go no further than me. Only I can see your answers, so you can be honest.

- Pick only those things that appeal or feel right, and pick the answers that send the clearest message. Most of the questions have the option of picking multiple answers. Some also have answers that specifically say that what you picked is as far as you'd like to go, where you'd like to get to, etc. Make use of them where it feels appropriate.

- Don't be afraid to answer honestly in the negative, either. Remember, I assume people don't want to sleep with me, so you won't be telling me anything new. There's no point to doing the poll if you can't be honest. I'm not going to suddenly cease to be your friend or anything.

- Ladies, even if all your answers are going to be in the negative, do the poll anyway. Can't hurt! And at least you'll know I'm not gunna try and jump your bones!

- I don't consider any answer you give in this poll to be anything more than an indication of your feelings in the matter at the precise time you answered the question, in a safe environment, well away from me. If you say you want to shag me rotten, I am not going to start trying to push for it in real life, tell people or anything else.

- Similarly, it's worth pointing out that just because you may say you wish to have sex with me or do anything else with me, it doesn't mean it will ever happen, whether I want it to or not.

- If you have any worries about my suddenly trying to stick my tongue down your throat based on your answers, read the 100 Days post Inability to Make a Move. Face it, before you would get kissed, groped, or anything else, you'd probably need a loudhailer, a neon sign, and possibly to tattoo the words "Dude, she really wants you!" on my forehead.

- If you are in a relationship, I will not treat any postive answers as indications that you're wanting do me behind your partner's back, or as anything other than, were you in a situation that allowed for it (i.e. single, or in an open relationship), this might be something you'd like to try for.

- And please, if you have to answer anonymously because you have no LJ, post to comments to tell me who you were and give me an idea of some of your answers so I can track back. I think it's only fair that I know, since I am baring myself pretty openly here, and the point of this is to at the very least, break down some barriers. I will feel especially cheated if you admitted to liking me and I had no idea who you are.



This has been, without a doubt, the most potentially humiliating, hardest, most challenging post/poll I've done. It's taken me so far outside my comfort zone, it's not funny. Well... ok... it is funny, but only a bit.

I'm not doing this poll to pick up, though I'll admit, it's crossed my mind. I'm doing this out of sheer curiousity. I'm so insanely unable to pick-up/act-on even the most blatant signals, it'll be interesting to see who I've missed, even if it's just low level, like hugs. Most of us have wondered if there are people out there that fancy us that we didn't know about.

I also know for a fact that there's been women that liked me that thought I had no interest in them, when that certainly wasn't the case. This lets us get all the cards on the table.

If you've ever wanted to know if anyone actually fancied you, do the poll. If you've ever liked someone and wondered if they felt the same way, do the poll. If you've ever wanted to tell someone that you desire them, but haven't been able to, do the poll. And if you've ever worried that I fancied you and you wanted to send the clear message that it ain't gunna happen, do the poll :)

Even if I'm none of those things to you, it may give us something interesting to talk about one day.

Oh, a final note. If you actually know someone who likes or fancies me, tell them about the poll. Give us both a chance to find out where we stand :)



***********************************************
Remember, don't be nice, be honest!

Which of the following would you feel comfortable or like to talk with me about for a few hours?

Politics
0(0.0%)
Relationships
0(0.0%)
World views
0(0.0%)
Emotions
0(0.0%)
Sex - General chit-chat
0(0.0%)
Private issues - health, fears, insecurities
0(0.0%)
Sex - Some Specifics
0(0.0%)
Australian issues
0(0.0%)
Doctor Who
0(0.0%)
Sex - Personal history, including things we've tried or would like to, masturbation, fantasies, etc. The lot!
0(0.0%)
Science
0(0.0%)
Movies/TV
0(0.0%)
Books
0(0.0%)
Fandom
0(0.0%)
Other
0(0.0%)

Other?

Places where you'd be willing/happy to talk about the things above...

Nowhere (in fact, why am I even filling this out?!)
0(0.0%)
Cafe
0(0.0%)
Fan Lounge
0(0.0%)
Hotel room
0(0.0%)
Lounge room
0(0.0%)
Bed room
0(0.0%)
Couch
0(0.0%)
On bed
0(0.0%)
In separate beds
0(0.0%)
In bed together
0(0.0%)
In shower/bath
0(0.0%)
In car
0(0.0%)
In tent
0(0.0%)
Via email
0(0.0%)
On phone
0(0.0%)

What level of physical contact would suit you for a hello/goodbye?

None
0(0.0%)
A handshake
0(0.0%)
A hug
2(12.5%)
A long hug
0(0.0%)
Full body hug, chest to chest.
0(0.0%)
A peck on the cheek
0(0.0%)
A little kiss on the cheek
0(0.0%)
A peck on the lips
0(0.0%)
A little kiss on the lips
0(0.0%)
A long kiss
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked, but wouldn't.
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked one day.
0(0.0%)
I do/have done as far as I marked, but would like to go further
0(0.0%)
I have done as far as I marked in the past, but wouldn't these days
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)

What level of contact while talking on couch?

Sitting across from each other
0(0.0%)
Sitting next to each other
0(0.0%)
Sitting close i.e. hip to hip
0(0.0%)
Head in lap / on shoulder
0(0.0%)
Cuddling up
0(0.0%)
Cuddling up with non sexual stroking/touching
1(6.2%)
Would like to go as far as marked, but wouldn't.
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked one day.
0(0.0%)
I do/have done as far as I marked, but would like to go further
0(0.0%)
I have done as far as I marked in the past, but wouldn't these days
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)
There's nothing here I'd be comfy with, sorry.
0(0.0%)

Talking on / in bed?

Sitting across from each other
1(6.7%)
Sitting close
0(0.0%)
Laying near each other not really touching.
0(0.0%)
Laying close
1(6.7%)
Close with head on shoulder / chest
0(0.0%)
Cuddling up - spooned
0(0.0%)
Cuddling up - close / face to face
0(0.0%)
Cuddling up with non sexual stroking/touching
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked, but wouldn't.
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked one day.
0(0.0%)
I do/have done as far as I marked, but would like to go further
0(0.0%)
I have done as far as I marked in the past, but wouldn't these days
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)
The whole bed thing is too much for me, sorry.
1(6.7%)

What level of dress would you be comfortable in with me around?

A suit of armour.
0(0.0%)
Fully clothed
1(6.7%)
Something slightly sexy / revealing
0(0.0%)
PJ's
0(0.0%)
T-Shirt and knickers
1(6.7%)
One piece bathers / leotard
0(0.0%)
Two piece swimsuit
0(0.0%)
Bra and panties
0(0.0%)
Just undies
0(0.0%)
Nude would be fine
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked, but wouldn't.
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked one day.
0(0.0%)
I do/have done as far as I marked, but would like to go further
0(0.0%)
You've seen me nude / partly dressed in the past, but it's unlikely to happen again.
0(0.0%)
You've seen me naked / partially dressed, and I have no problem if it happens again
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)

What level of clothing would you be comfortable in me wearing around you?

A large concrete block
0(0.0%)
Regular clothes
1(6.7%)
Shirt or T and Shorts
0(0.0%)
Shirt or T and boxers
0(0.0%)
Shirt or T and jocks
0(0.0%)
Very Long T-shirt
0(0.0%)
Jocks
0(0.0%)
A sock!
0(0.0%)
If you're getting changed around me, don't bother hiding on my account, but if I never see anything, it doesn't matter.
1(6.7%)
Nude is fine
0(0.0%)
I've seen it all, no urge to see again
0(0.0%)
I've seen it all and I want to see it some more, please.
0(0.0%)
I'd like to see you naked, but it's only out of curiousity, not desire.
1(6.7%)
I really want to see you naked.
0(0.0%)
I only want to see your dick!
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)

Back on the couch, talking about 'stuff' - nothing too frenzied.

Cuddles and stroking, some flesh contact, but only enough for us to feel nice.
0(0.0%)
Be happy talking, being close, no goals but willing to see how things go.
1(8.3%)
Maybe some gentle touching or even teasing through clothes, though nothing too extreme.
0(0.0%)
Hands drifting under clothes, but the exploration doesn't reach erogenous zones.
0(0.0%)
Maybe the occasional chaste or tender kiss.
0(0.0%)
Perhaps the occasional brush of an erogenous zone through cloth
0(0.0%)
Hopefully some loosening of clothing is going on!
0(0.0%)
Man, I hope you're a good kisser!
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked, but wouldn't.
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked one day.
0(0.0%)
I do/have done as far as I marked, but would like to go further
0(0.0%)
I have done as far as I marked in the past, but wouldn't these days
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)
Nope, there's nothing here I'd be comfy with, sorry.
4(33.3%)

Back in Bed, close or cuddling.

Be happy talking, being close, no need for more.
1(7.1%)
Would only be comfortable fully clothed
0(0.0%)
Would be fine in PJ's, t-shirt or underwear.
0(0.0%)
Happy to cuddle naked, but not wanting more that skin to skin.
0(0.0%)
Talking, being close, no push for more but happy to see where it leads.
1(7.1%)
Maybe the occasional chaste or tender kiss.
0(0.0%)
Naked cuddles with some nice non-sexual stroking / touching.
0(0.0%)
Nudity, touching, but only the occasional brush of an erogenous zone.
0(0.0%)
Some nice kissing would be good.
0(0.0%)
Hopefully some gentle fondling, stroking with no huge boundaries, though nothing too insistant
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked, but wouldn't.
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked one day.
0(0.0%)
I do/have done as far as I marked, but would like to go further
0(0.0%)
I have done as far as I marked in the past, but wouldn't these days
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)
Dude, I went home an hour ago, you're asleep and dreaming
1(7.1%)

Nearly there... So, let's not beat around the bush too much (so to speak).

Lots of gentle kissing, cuddling, fondling... generally getting each other warmed up?
0(0.0%)
Would you like to be be teased and caressed?
0(0.0%)
Does being touched or played with down below appeal?
0(0.0%)
What about having your genitals kissed or licked?
0(0.0%)
What about heading things my way, any desire to spend time driving me wild?
0(0.0%)
Any desire to touch, stroke my cock?
0(0.0%)
Or go down on me?
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked, but wouldn't.
0(0.0%)
Would like to go as far as marked one day.
0(0.0%)
I do/have done as far as I marked, but would like to go further
0(0.0%)
I have done as far as I marked in the past, but wouldn't these days
0(0.0%)
If I weren't happily involved in a relationship, I'd like to go as far as marked.
0(0.0%)
We're beyond my interest here, sorry.
6(46.2%)

So, sex?

Sorry, no.
6(37.5%)
I'm definitely curious, but no.
3(18.8%)
Maybe.
3(18.8%)
I'm curious and I'd like to...
3(18.8%)
Oh yes please!
1(6.2%)

Getting away from the directly sexual, and back to the more intimate... You don't have to have any intent to ever do these things with me, but tick those that reflect what you would be interested in...

A non-sexual shower or bath where you wash me down sounds nice.
0(0.0%)
A non-sexual full body massage would be lovely.
0(0.0%)
I'd like to pose for sexy, nude, or erotic photos.
0(0.0%)
Would love for you to hold me while I masturbate.
0(0.0%)
Could you let me see or maybe touch your penis. Nothing sexual, just curious.
0(0.0%)
I would just love to pay you lots attention.
0(0.0%)
I'd like you to pose for me.
0(0.0%)
I have no interest, but was curious about the poll.
3(20.0%)
I would love to share a bed with you, even if that's all it was.
0(0.0%)
Would love to hold or watch you while you masturbate.
0(0.0%)
Can we talk about all this at some point?
0(0.0%)
Would really love to discuss sex with you.
0(0.0%)
I would love just to be held for an evening, or all night long.
0(0.0%)
Would love to talk the night away.
0(0.0%)
Would love to talk the night away in low light with clothing optional / decreasing, but nothing more
0(0.0%)

So, the whole sex / cuddles thing with me and my posts...

The Penis Post actually decreased my interest
0(0.0%)
Penis Post made no difference one way or the other.
0(0.0%)
Penis Post made me more curious about you.
0(0.0%)
The Human Sexuality Post lessened my desire for you
0(0.0%)
Human Sexuality made no difference
0(0.0%)
Human Sexuality increased my desire to become intimate
0(0.0%)
The Needing Intimacy Post lowered my urge be close to you.
0(0.0%)
The Intimacy Post changed nothing
0(0.0%)
The Intimacy Post made me want to be closer to you
0(0.0%)
The My Sexuality Post created some distance
0(0.0%)
My Sexuality - no change in my attitude towards you.
0(0.0%)
My sexuality made me want to get closer to you
0(0.0%)
100 Days has killed my desire for you
0(0.0%)
100 Days has changed nothing
0(0.0%)
100 Days has made me more interested in getting closer.
2(14.3%)

My penis, like most, has a mind of its own. If we were sitting/laying around or cuddled up in a not-overly-sexual situation, and you realised I had an erection...

I would feel uncomfortable.
0(0.0%)
I'd feel uncomfortable, but I know that it doesn't mean you're thinking about sex.
2(13.3%)
I would probably keep glancing at your crotch.
0(0.0%)
I would probably keep glancing at your crotch, even though I have no interest in you sexually.
0(0.0%)
If we were cuddled up and I felt it, I'd be uncomfortable and maybe move away.
0(0.0%)
If we were cuddled up and I felt it, I wouldn't be bothered.
0(0.0%)
If we were cuddled up and I felt it, I'd be uncomfortable and maybe move away, but I'd know that it doesn't mean you're thinking about sex.
0(0.0%)
If we were cuddled up and I felt it, I would probably like it a little.
0(0.0%)
If we were cuddled up and I felt it, I would probably like it a little, even though I have no interest in you sexually.
0(0.0%)
It's natural, I'm not bothered either way.
0(0.0%)
It may arouse me slightly.
0(0.0%)
It would almost certainly arouse me.
0(0.0%)
It'd be nice if I was the reason it's there.
0(0.0%)
I would love to see it.
0(0.0%)
If we were cuddled up, I'd probably move so that it was pressed more firmly against me.
0(0.0%)
If we were cuddled up, I'd probably move so that it was pressed more firmly against me, though I have no interest in you.
0(0.0%)
I would hope you'd make a move on me.
0(0.0%)
I would want to make a move on you.
0(0.0%)

There are a few people here that are merely acquaintances or friends, some that I love as friends, a few that I am in love with, and a few that I am sexually attracted to. Given you've answered so many questions, and regardless of how you've answered, would you like to know the truth from my end?

No.
1(5.9%)
It may make me uncomfortable, so no.
0(0.0%)
It may change the friendship, so no.
2(11.8%)
I'm in a relationship, so no.
0(0.0%)
I would be curious but still nervous.
2(11.8%)
Yes.
2(11.8%)
Good or bad, just tell me.
2(11.8%)
Yes, may as well finally know for sure.
0(0.0%)
No idea.
0(0.0%)
I know the truth, you've told me.
0(0.0%)
I'm pretty sure I know it all, but hey, may as well find out for sure.
1(5.9%)
If you think there's more to tell than I already know, please tell me.
2(11.8%)
I would like as few secrets between us as possible.
0(0.0%)
I prefer not knowing.
0(0.0%)
Only tell me if you really love/care for me.
0(0.0%)
Only tell me if you really love/care for me. I don't feel that strongly towards you, but it'd be nice to know.
0(0.0%)

So, how do you feel towards me?

You're ok, I guess.
0(0.0%)
You're a friend.
0(0.0%)
You're a dear friend
2(11.8%)
I love you as a friend
1(5.9%)
There's maybe a little lust mixed in.
0(0.0%)
There's maybe a small romantic part, too
0(0.0%)
I'm in love with you.
0(0.0%)
I'm in love with you and may as well tell you at last, just so you know.
0(0.0%)
I trust you.
0(0.0%)
I want you.
0(0.0%)
I don't really know you, except through here.
2(11.8%)
I don't like you that much, sorry.
0(0.0%)
I'd like more contact with you.
0(0.0%)
I like you.
0(0.0%)
I lust after you.
0(0.0%)

If you have anything to add to that, this is the place to do it...

Has your interest in sex with me changed since I shaved off the beard?

No.
11(73.3%)
Yes, I am more interested in sex with you.
3(20.0%)
Yes, I am less interested in sex with you.
1(6.7%)

Now, remembering that this is not binding in any way... Have you ever, at any time...

Wanted increased physical intimacy with me?
0(0.0%)
Wanted sexual contact with me?
0(0.0%)
Been curious about sexual contact with me?
0(0.0%)
Been turned on by my presense / proximity / touch?
0(0.0%)
Actively fantasised about sexual contact with me?
0(0.0%)
Masturbated about me?
0(0.0%)
Thought seriously about asking me for something sexual?
0(0.0%)
Fantasised about me while with someone else?
0(0.0%)
Cum while thinking about me?
0(0.0%)
Wanted to buy the vibrator that looks like my cock?
1(10.0%)
Perved on my crotch?
0(0.0%)
Perved on my backside?
0(0.0%)
Wanted to talk to me about any of these things?
1(10.0%)
Wished I would make a move?
0(0.0%)
Gotten aroused because of 100 Days posts/polls
1(10.0%)

Want to add something to the above, here's where you can...

Those of you who have talked to me about personal matters / sex / relationships / etc... How good / helpful / interesting was the talk? 1 for least, 10 for best. Don't be kind, be honest...

Mean: 8.89 Median: 9 Std. Dev 1.37
1
0(0.0%)
2
0(0.0%)
3
0(0.0%)
4
0(0.0%)
5
0(0.0%)
6
1(11.1%)
7
1(11.1%)
8
0(0.0%)
9
3(33.3%)
10
4(44.4%)

A question for the small handful of you on here who have had sex with me... How do I rate? 1 for least, 10 for best. Don't be kind, be honest...

Mean: 8.00 Median: 8 Std. Dev 0.00
1
0(0.0%)
2
0(0.0%)
3
0(0.0%)
4
0(0.0%)
5
0(0.0%)
6
0(0.0%)
7
0(0.0%)
8
2(100.0%)
9
0(0.0%)
10
0(0.0%)

How did you feel about the My Sexuality post?

I didn't like it.
0(0.0%)
I didn't read it.
0(0.0%)
It was ok.
0(0.0%)
It was interesting
0(0.0%)
Ummm...Wow.
2(11.8%)
I liked the honesty.
1(5.9%)
I found the honesty confronting.
0(0.0%)
Made me not want to talk to you about this stuff.
0(0.0%)
It aroused me.
0(0.0%)
Want sex now!
0(0.0%)
Masturbated / Will masturbate.
0(0.0%)
It made me more curious in you sexually.
0(0.0%)
It made me more curious in you as a person.
0(0.0%)
It put me off you.
0(0.0%)
It made me really want to talk to you/share my thoughts about all this stuff.
0(0.0%)

Second last question. How did you feel about this poll?

I liked doing it
0(0.0%)
I hated doing it
0(0.0%)
It was interesting
3(17.6%)
It really pushed my limits
0(0.0%)
I found it difficult to be honest with my answers.
1(5.9%)
It allowed me to voice things that I couldn't have said otherwise
0(0.0%)
I still couldn't say all I wanted to, sorry.
1(5.9%)
It made me nervous.
0(0.0%)
It aroused me slightly.
0(0.0%)
I want sex!
0(0.0%)
Masturbated / Will masturbate.
0(0.0%)
It made me more curious in you sexually.
0(0.0%)
It made me more curious in you as a person.
0(0.0%)
It put me off you.
0(0.0%)
It made me really want to talk to you/share my thoughts about all this stuff.
0(0.0%)

Final thoughts...





As a last word, if anyone wants the raw code for this poll, I still have it.
Tags: love & hate, poll, serious thoughts, sex
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