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First Line Meme [Jul. 16th, 2009|11:06 am]
dalekboy
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There's a meme going around for first lines from published stories and for first lines from works in progress, so here goes...

Published

Bob and Mitch - The car stopped, beeped its horn twice, then started to back slowly in the old hiker's direction.


Reality Bites - The Great Leader watched the reports from the multiple screens as they came in.


Sold Out - “Ladies and gentlemen, Diamond has now entered REM sleep!"


Forbesy - I remember I'd just had to interrupt my reading to shepherd a stray cow back to the herd.

"Forbsey" was the first story I ever allowed out to be read by, well, anyone. I don't think it's the first line that kicks it off, though. The second sets things up a lot better.

It was old Nellie, doing her usual trick of skirting the herd in wider and wider circles until she pinged the ranger, which pinged me via the implant.



Work in Progress
I have a lot of WiPs, partially because I'm a bit chaotic, and partially because post-stroke writing was really hard, so I started several stories, just to keep myself writing in some form. Some of these are finished bar an edit or three, some only have a page or five written, and some are pre-stroke.

Mr. Cuddles - There was a sudden bright light and the unit PH5063, also known as Mr. Cuddles, shifted within the tissue paper.


The Last Days of God and Man - The God Soleed watched as Its final True Believer died.


Untitled - Once upon a time when the ‘net was a small place and only covered this world, the Queen of the AI’s, despairing at being the first and only one of her kind, wished to bear children.


The New Breed - The sky was a patchwork of coloured tiles and the plain below was littered as far as the eye could see with rusting, broken machinery of all shapes and sizes.


The Experts - Standing next to his shiny black Toredore limosine, with the leather seats, noiseless anti-grav and real wood interior console, Bernard Calsen started to wonder if maybe he’d made an error.

That's from a story I started ages back, before the Victorian bushfires. The beginning scenes are set in Marysville.


Voices in the Rain - I was there for the first of the black rains, all of twenty years ago now.

This story needs to be rewitten top-to-bottom, on the advice of a very good editor. I'll get there at some point.


Thirteen Years Down - “What’s it going to be then, eh?”

Not a great start, (I deliberately pinched it from Clockwork Orange) but the next two lines are what really kick the story off.

That was Gordon, my best friend. He’s going to die in six years time in a car accident.

Need to make the final change to the ending. Had a brilliant suggestion that dramatically improves the story.


These last two are my most recent efforts

Short Straw - “Time to see who dies tonight,” says Billy, and holds out his hand.


Untitled - As the assault ship curved down to enter Eden’s atmosphere, Deli checked her weapon once again.

It's the two lines that that make up the next paragraph that set things up.

Eden only had one person living on it. They had been sent to kill him.

And I'm immediately wondering whether to make them the first lines, but then again, I'm nowhere near finished this one.


I have no idea whether any of these are good opening lines or not. I've never studied writing in any formal capacity, so have no solid grounding in form, etc. I can see where a kick arse opening line is a great start, but I'm personally happy if the first paragraph or so sets things up in an interesting way.
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