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*kaf* *kaf* baby *kaf* [Jul. 18th, 2008|11:45 am]
dalekboy
[Tags|, , , ]
[mood |sicksick]

I have a cold. It's to be expected. I'm mixing with a lot of people with swimming and such, not to mention going from a heated pool to the Canberra cold. It's slowing down my progress on getting through things, but I'm not fussed.

I was actually feeling crap enough that I spent several hours lying in bed yesteday. At one point, as I was lying there, I thought "Ahhhh.... this is a luxury I won't have shortly." Once my Manitou demon-spawn comes bursting out Sharon's back (how many people get that reference?) being able to actually rest while sick will become a thing of the past.

I'm looking forward to the oncoming insanity and chaos. It helps that both Sharon and I are bright enough to know that no matter how much we know, we're still fully unprepared for the impact the little bugger will have on our lives. That all those things that we'd rather not do with our child, well, some of those are going to get smashed through by the reality train. We want the baby in our room, to make life easier on Sharon having to get up and feed, etc., knowing full well that we may give up and put the baby in its own room out of sheer desperation for a night's sleep.

I'm still hoping that it'll pop out and be a girl. I've heard three different stories of babies being firmly identified as male during scans, only to have it come out female. But as long as it's born healthy, has all its limbs, a head, teeth, claws, and a prehensile tail, that's all that matters.

It's also going to be an interesting experiment. I've had a few people comment on how small children always want the comfort of mum when things go wrong, and I can't help but wonder how much of that has to do with mum usually being the primary care-giver. At the moment, I'm the only guy I know who is going to be primary care-giver for their baby, so will be interesting to see down the track who Lex goes to for comfort.

Music will be interesting, too. Lex will get to hear a broad range of stuff - blues, classical, euro-pop, techno, 1920s and onwards, John Barry soundtracks to Bond movies, rock, Devo, Big Pig, Garbage, the Goons, KLF, Swedish death metal, the Residents... what will appeal? I like Hi Five, but how much of their music can I listen to on endless repeat? How many Doctor Who soundtracks can Lex listen to before he starts screaming?

I'm looking forward to the firsts... first word (quasinuclearphaseinterlockeddipthrungretarders), first laugh, first steps, first tattoo... looking forward to reading to him, myths and fables, childrens classics, Dr Suess, Tintin, Asterix and Obelix, various Shaun Tan... and introducing the film and TV that I love, Doctor Who, Star Wars, Twilight Zone, Catweazle, Hammer Horror movies (though not til the age of six, of course), Gamera, The Adventures of Superman, The Day the Earth Stood Still, the Disney classics, Pixar films...

Can't be prepared for any of the twists and surprises (Lex, why did you set fire to Parliament?), or the nasty shocks (You want to be a chartered accountant?) but I'm looking forward to the adventure.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: arcadiagt5
2008-07-18 02:48 am (UTC)
I think you're about as well prepared as any parent could be, and probably better than most. You're seriously thinking about it, and taking advance steps such as the swimming lessons.

I think you and Sharon will do just fine.

Oh and re this bit:

Can't be prepared for any of the twists and surprises (Lex, why did you set fire to Parliament?), or the nasty shocks (You want to be a chartered accountant?) but I'm looking forward to the adventure.

The former might be a problem but can't really see the latter happening. :)
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[User Picture]From: ariaflame
2008-07-18 02:58 am (UTC)
Kids can rebel in funny ways.

I think you guys will be fine though. You're wise enough to have prepared what you can, and to know that there's some stuff you won't have forseen.

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[User Picture]From: rachelholkner
2008-07-18 03:22 am (UTC)
I like Hi Five, but how much of their music can I listen to on endless repeat? How many Doctor Who soundtracks can Lex listen to before he starts screaming?

You like Hi Five? I don't think we can be friends anymore ;-)
No, what I wanted to point out was that kids love the familiar, and love repetition. So Dr Who soundtracks should be fine!
I watched so much M*A*S*H and BtVS while I was pregnant that for a short while after she was born Abbey would pay close attention when either of those themes were played.
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-07-18 03:39 am (UTC)
I do like Hi Five, and not just because all the female members fancy me. I like that they wear bright clothes, have coloured hair. I like the teaching with songs aspect, etc. Though I admit i haven't seen it in years. I also don't mind the Wiggles. Strangely, they all fancy me, too.

MASH/BtVS story is great :)
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[User Picture]From: cheshirenoir
2008-07-18 03:23 am (UTC)
Welcome to the journey. Every day is different.

(Somebody started crawling this week. They are also only waking for one feed a night now.)
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[User Picture]From: dcrisp
2008-07-18 03:25 am (UTC)
First time he (or she) brings a person of the opposite sex home who you disapprove of and have to threaten with a large shotgun.

First time He (or she) brings a person of the opposite sex home for purly platonic fun and you hand them a box of condoms and embarrass them both.
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[User Picture]From: dalekboy
2008-07-18 07:45 am (UTC)
Yay! The stay-at-home dad thing is way too rare.
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[User Picture]From: smofbabe
2008-07-18 04:26 am (UTC)
A friend was the primary caregiver for his twin girls - if you would like to read his LJ, which often deals with the babies, he's hzatz.

I'm sure you and Sharon will be great parents... and also that you're right about not getting any sleep for a while :->
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[User Picture]From: frzn_mmnt
2008-07-18 04:27 am (UTC)
You'll be amazed what is instinctual about being a parent for the first time. I was. It's your baby and you just know.

A small word of advice... Nursing is hard work, whether it comes naturally and easy or not. Being the sole person who can give nourishment to a tiny baby every two hours is very demanding... I found that Dad's role in getting up and doing the nappy changes and all the during the night to be indespensible.

Oh and you'll get used to having the babe sleeping in the same room as you, it becomes a sort of comfort listening to the sound of him breathing as you drift off to sleep.
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[User Picture]From: cheshirenoir
2008-07-18 04:36 am (UTC)
Heh. You see this is one of the things I love about talking with other parents. You see, we choofed both our kids off to their own rooms quite early, and I think it was one of the best things we did.

For us, that is. I can't suggest other parents do this but for US, it worked.

One thing that was frustrating with the first child (But we got the hang of for the second child) is that there is SO much advice out there. SO much contradiction. It come about because EVERY child is different. What worked for Mum / Dad / Aunt Thelma / The strange smelling Cat Lady at the bus stop MAY NOT WORK FOR YOU!

So. Don't let anyone tell you you are doing it wrong. Cos someone will tell you (Very shortly) that you are doing it right.

(Heck between bub 1 and bub 2 we got told that we no longer had to sterilise everything! We still did for a short while, but as soon as bub 2 was putting things in their mouth there really didn't seem much point. "Oh here, take that dirty spoon you snatched off my desk out of your mouth and have this nice clean sterilised bottle")

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[User Picture]From: angriest
2008-07-18 04:35 am (UTC)
I can not lie: the main reason I desire to have a child one day is to terrify their dates once they start being stupid enough to bring them home.
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[User Picture]From: arcadiagt5
2008-07-18 05:20 am (UTC)
Let me guess: the second reason is the opportunity to use embarassing baby photos/stories at 18th and 21st birthday parties.

:)
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[User Picture]From: vegetus
2008-07-18 07:35 am (UTC)
Life is full of surprises. The more people you have close interaction with the more likely you are to have cool random stuff happen. Small people add more randomness. You'll both be fine.

And you can also take the story of my aunt who belived her second child would be a girl and then brought her son home to a room that was pink and frilly as to the accuracy of gender determination through ultrasound :P
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[User Picture]From: jocko55
2008-07-19 02:15 am (UTC)

Nothing is ever the same

As a baby, my daughter used to cry every time she heard the Buffy theme music. So i recorded 2 1/2 seasons and watched Sex and the City--still hanging out to see the movie! Right now Gen and her friend jess are making Honey joys in the kitchen; yummy.
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[User Picture]From: kaelajael
2008-07-21 07:29 am (UTC)
I think you're right about wanting the primary caregiver for comfort.

As an infant/toddler my youngest child would go to Tusk before he came to me, and he would go to battblush before he came to me. Although I swear it is because I was so upset about being pregnant for almost the entire pregnancy that he picked up on those emotions. Munchkin is the the most affectionate kid now, but he didn't want to know me then.
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From: fe2h2o
2008-07-21 09:51 am (UTC)
Bilby is _very_ much her Dada's girl... unless she's hungry, she tends to go to livelurker for comfort (well, when he's home), even though I'm the one who's there most of the time:-)

Kids love what they hear music-wise:-) Puggle sings folksongs with me:-) His current favourite is the Skye Boat song... The days are _far_ too long in my opinion to spend the time listening to music that you don't really like:-) (I blogged in the last couple of days about children and music... there's a link to an interesting article on the topic... No link here though, so you'll actually need to go there to see it:-) )

Personally, I'm in the 'baby in the room' camp:-) I don't wake when it's time to feed after the first couple of months... unless there's more needed than just a feed... makes for _much_ less sleeplessness:-) (Or at least, that's the way it's worked with the first two... we'll see what happens with Cygnet:-) )
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